Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Discussion: Christian "Charity"

From “moderate” blogger Bill Gnade (who may be a fake crazy person just made up to trick me):

I believe universal health care could suck the life out of living in America. It seems the end of heroism. Think of all the amazing stories we've heard about, where whole neighborhoods and towns rally around a sick person who can't afford expensive medical treatments. Think of the fund-raising, the charitable drives; think about the bake sales and motorcycle rallies and skate-a-thons and countless other awesome community-based, VOLUNTARY actions that will be lost if EVERY medical expense were covered -- FOR FREE!
My questions: Do some Christians oppose secular government measures to help others because it will mean less Christian charity? Are they just grasping for straws in the face of failure? Am I the only person sickened by this mentality of the impoverished being seen as some sort of font from which feelings of satisfaction are bestowed upon the over-privileged who deign to grace but a handful of the thousands who die annually from preventable illness with the means for treatment (provided of course they go to the right church, and certainly never dependent upon the color of their skin...)?

Monday, March 29, 2010

Yuppie Welfare

My wife did our taxes this weekend (I highly recommend marrying a Jew). I imagine most of you who are American and read my blog have already filed or are planning to do so soon. As you do, think about what that money is going towards.

A large chunk is going to the great “Wars of Terrorist Recruitment” in Iraq, Afghanistan, and ever-so-quietly Pakistan. Afghanistan is quickly becoming Obama’s Vietnam, and Pakistan is his Cambodia. I have a theory that he’s trying to catch Bin Laden, as nabbing him before his first term is up would cement his re-election. In my estimation, dozens of kids die so that a politician can appear tough on terror. Some yuppie is sending the people from my generation off to murder and die for the paranoia of the yuppie and baby boomer population of America.

Then there’s social security, or as I think of it: Yuppie Welfare. You see, social security was a great idea planned by responsible people from a complete different generation. They were the Builders, the pre-WWII, Depression Era Americans who had to work twice as hard for half as much. They were fundamentally different from the Baby Boomers and Yuppies that followed.

The Baby Boomers grew up in an era of plenty. They never knew want, they were the first generation raised on the TV, and their coming of age was during the 60’s. Most weren’t hippies, though this is the generation that spawned that subculture. Instead, most were fed a steady diet of anti-Russian, anti-Communist rhetoric from the scary Conservatives known as Kennedy and Johnson. Their failure to suppress media coverage of setbacks during the Vietnam War was an error seldom repeated since.

The Yuppies came to power around the time children became the most powerful force in the nation. This was the 80’s, the era of “Think of the children!” legislation censoring everything: magazines, radio, art, music, comedians, etc.

Yuppies grow up largely to become ignorant fools with little guidance. They fall for Reagan’s bullshit during the 80’s. They gamble their future away on the trust of bankers, deregulating left and right. Before you know it, social security (remember that?) is mismanaged beyond repair.

Now we have my generation, Generation Too Busy To Have a Name. Generation X just squeaked in and got some of the fat of the land, but the bones were picked dry by the time we showed up. We often hold 2-3 jobs without benefits. We work harder for less gain. Our safety net is gone, as we cannot count on Social Security to provide anything but a pittance (that’s assuming we don’t die from something as simple as the flu, since we can’t go to the doctor without risking a $2k medical bill to get antibiotics).

And to top it all off… these yuppies, these irresponsible goons who put us in the dog house… they have the unprecedented audacity to shout for fiscal responsibility any time my generation might stand to gain. It is not the old farts on Medicare who have to worry about medical bills. These socialist yuppies take from the government freely but shout bloody-Commie-murder if it might mean anyone else getting hand-outs.

For once, I’m glad the life expectancy of Americans has been on the decline. We are going to enjoy sending you to horribly maintained old-folks homes where you can meet some people who make minimum wage as they unskillfully apply your catheter.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Reach Out and Touch Someone

At the risk of Bill Gnade’s knee-jerk, “It’s a hoax!” reaction…

One Mike Vanderboegh is calling for vandalism against Democratic Party offices in his blog. Mike subscribes to the “I can say whatever I want” school of blogging. I can relate to that.

Mike is a big gun lover and figures the federal guvment is out to get him. Note: inciting violence is a great way to begin this self-fulfilling prophecy.

Mike’s a typical “libtertarian.” He bitches about how the liberals keep him down. Did I mention he lives on government disability checks and receives $1,300 per month for medical conditions? The bum doesn’t even work; he gets health insurance through his wife’s job.

For those interested, Mike lives at:

6635 Womack Rd
Pinson, Alabama 35126

He can be reached by phone at: (205) 681-0324

His wife’s name is Rose.

So let him know how you feel. Comment on his blog, give him a call, or even better, send him a check. He’s in the habit of taking hand-outs. And Mike, if you are reading this: we have already sent the predator drone. Clutch that gun until your knuckles are white.

From the Blogger Terms of Service:
Hate Speech: We want you to use Blogger to express your opinions, even very controversial ones. But, don't cross the line by publishing hate speech. By this, we mean content that promotes hate or violence towards groups based on race, ethnicity, religion, disability, gender, age, veteran status, or sexual orientation/gender identity. For example, don't write a blog saying that members of Race X are criminals or advocating violence against followers of Religion Y.


Personal and confidential information: It's not ok to publish another person's personal and confidential information. For example, don't post someone else's credit card numbers, Social Security numbers, unlisted phone numbers, and driver's license numbers. Also, please keep in mind that in most cases, information that is already available elsewhere on the Internet or in public records is not considered to be private or confidential under our policies.

[Unless the Democrats are a religion, he seems to be within the rules; as am I.]

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Catholic Conundrum

American Evangelicals must have been insecure again (I’m guessing over healthcare), because the Catholic Church is back in the news for all the familiar reasons. Here are some things atheists should consider before merrily jumping on board the Popebashing Express.

For one thing, most of the cases are decades old. One has to actually think about this historically from a church official’s standpoint. It has nothing to do with public image. Rather, this is a church legitimately based on forgiveness.

I have no doubt the offending priests seemed very sorry and probably even promised to never do it again. If this happened today, we would think they were idiots because hindsight is 20/20. At the time, before this pattern became apparent, it seemed an act of mercy.

There is another problem: the Catholic Church is huge. It’s the single biggest Christian sect, both nationally in US and globally. The fact is, this kind of abuse happens in other faiths, from Judaism to Protestantism to Islam. It even occurs in secular settings, such as sports. There is no “pattern,” just more cases due to the enormous size.

There is nothing structurally wrong with the Catholic Church that is somehow causing, encouraging, or allowing sexual abuse. Celibacy plays no role in the matter. Yes, the Catholic priesthood has plenty of men who may be classified as homosexual, but they’re far more likely to engage in sex with other adult men. Plenty of married Protestant pastors and Jewish Rabbis have been found guilty of molesting young boys.

None of this excuses the acts of abuse. I just think somebody should remind the atheists that Catholics are an oft maligned group. I don’t tend to mock Catholics just as I don’t tend to mock Scientologists: because I wasn’t the lazy bully who made fun of the retarded kid in class. I like a challenge: picking on the bully. “But Ginx, the Catholic Church is huge!” Quit picking on the fat kid, you fucktard.

The Catholic Church makes plenty of mistakes: discouraging condom use, opposing abortion, blah blah blah… but most Catholics are only about a 5 or 6 on the 1-10 “Annoying Scale.” I don’t need to be doing the Mormons or Evangelicals any favors by pretending their biggest competition is somehow worse than they are.

Really, what is it bothering you if you’re not Catholic, anyway? It should be Catholics who are up in arms; it’s their kids! The fact is, it’s rare. Very rare. Clearly I wasn’t. They don’t touch the ones with big mouths.

I think the lesson here is: teach your kids to speak up.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

What’s It All About?

There are words we use all the time that have several different meanings, and sometimes we even use words we cannot define. “Good” and “bad” come to mind. “That movie was good, though I didn’t like it.” That sentence almost doesn’t make sense, but we are able to take away from it that the person saying it did not personally like the movie, but they recognized the movie itself was not flawed. We can assume it is a matter of taste. “I want to be a good person” is much more difficult to discuss.

Of all of these words, none are thrown around American political debates more than “liberal” and “conservative.” I have spent well over a decade actively interested in politics, reading extensively not only news and modern opinion pieces, but also history. I have read so many “What is liberal/conservative?” pieces, I hesitate to bother adding to the clutter.

Yet here I am, sitting down to pretend I can set the record straight.

I can simplify my outlook on it by one simple mechanic: reactionism. Human beings are creatures of habit. Most people try new things on a relatively rare basis. “But Ginx, I am adventurous and eat new foods and visit new places!” That’s great, but I’m sure that when you visit Hong Kong to eat a wife cake, you will still wake up in the morning, shower, brush your teeth, get dressed…

This is not a critique of humanity; it is merely a fact. Routine enables us to perform the tasks necessary for living. These rituals of life become ensconced in culture. There is a form of security in tradition: it’s worked so far. The problem is, our world is not static. If the world changes, we must change with it. Moreover, if we cling to tradition, we give up on progress out of a fear of failure.

A liberal is one who tries new things; a conservative is one who sticks with what they perceive to be the best available option from the past. That’s it. There is nothing more complex about it. It’s not about “big government” versus “small government.” It’s not about spending, or abortion, or immigration, or wars. It’s all about reaction to the current trend.

Because of this, there is a strange set of circumstances when viewed globally over history. Liberals in one place and time bear little resemblance in actual ideology to liberals in another place and time. The methods used to enact change (words and weapons) are the only thing shared by all liberals. These are also the tools used by conservatives, so one cannot identify a group by their methods.

Instead, one must look at what is considered “normal.” This, too, is difficult to define. Normal can be what is most common, or it can be an uncommon ideal, but it tends to be the stereotypes of a society. Conservatives defend normalcy and are the keepers of the back-up plan: a return to what is familiar. Conservative reinforce norms, while liberals seek to redefine them.

Oddly, it is the goal of all liberals to become conservatives. The new, cutting edge ideas enacted by one generation are the established orthodoxy of the next. It is a conservative’s nightmare to become the liberal, for the liberal must actually work to get the world to agree. Conservatism is the incumbent, and liberalism is the challenger.

Because these labels are so fluid, it is futile to go through history and try to determine who was liberal and who was conservative. Is Jesus a bare-foot hippy or a fire and brimstone fear-mongerer? Is Hitler a vegetarian liberal or a father-land defending conservative?

In America, there are few liberal politicians. Dennis Kucinich is one. Bernie Sanders is another. But the fact is, there is no liberal party. Democrats are every bit as conservative as Republicans, they just aren’t as cruel and thoughtless. But both parties viciously defend the two-party system, America’s failed economic policies, our alliance with Israel, predatory businesses and banks, etc. Both parties also oppose drug legalization, public healthcare or anything remotely “socialist.”

America has given up on trying new things. It took us forever to pass anything related to healthcare, and even then it is nothing but a boon for private insurance companies with plenty of loopholes for abuse still open. America is so conservative, it is afraid to take anything but baby steps, even in well charted territory.

And people around the world wonder why we don’t adopt the metric system? We can’t even fix our healthcare when millions of people die due to money-grubbing insurance companies. We’ve become the old man who can’t even set the clock on his VCR, while the rest of the world has DVD players.

Monday, March 22, 2010

A Dire Threat

My fellow gentle Americans… I post tonight not to warm your hearts, but to sound the trumpet in warning. There is an insidious enemy in our midst.

Every single day, over 11,000 of them enter our great nation. They don’t speak English, and they don’t get around to learning it for years (even then you can barely understand them). They show up without any education, or even vaccinations. They leech off of those around them, suckling at the American teat. They don’t seek employment for years, even decades. And worst of all, once they show up, all they do is whine and cry. I’m talking, of course, about babies.

Every year, over four million of these mooches gain amnesty into our great nation by a loophole in the Constitution, without any sort of background check or discernible skills. Their continued influx is a danger to the nation and our economy. Who will pay for them all? Did you know that 99.9% of all criminals were once babies? Truly eye opening. [I think the .1% have the Benjamin Button disease.]

In light of this threat, staunch conservatives should reconsider their stance on abortion and gay marriage, currently our only recourse against these pernicious parasites. People, we must curtail our copious copulation! If two people have four babies, and they’re kids have four babies, that’s eight inbred babies. The problem is multiplying... so to speak.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

A Cult Classic

There is an experiment one may do to see what type of atheist a believer would make. If you are an atheist, ask your theist test subject how they feel about as many of the following as they’ve heard of:

Christian Scientists
Church of Satanists
The Order of the Solar Temple
Heaven’s Gate
Branch Davidians
Aum Shinrikyo
The Church of Bible Understanding
The People’s Temple
The Church of the Lamb of God

Likewise, if you are a theist (and apparently read my site in order to electively fulfill your persecution quota), you may imagine what you would be like as an atheist by analyzing your answers to the above. Hell, if you’re Protestant, you could include Catholics, and vice-versa.

How do theists respond to these groups? I have found it is largely based on what the theist has heard about that particular organization. Most people have heard of Scientology, and most non-Scientologists are pretty critical of it. An alien bringing souls to Earth trillions of years ago (in a universe possibly only billions of years old, mind you) seems far-fetched to people, but it actually seems as plausible to me as some unexplained divinity blowing air into dirt thousands of years ago.

The truth is, most people know little or nothing about the actual beliefs or practices of Scientology. Most non-Scientologists are content with hearing the ridiculous parts of Scientology and making a judgment, whether they are atheist or Christian or Muslim or Jewish or Buddhist or agnostic or anything else under the sun.

Scientology isn’t very popular, but how do theists feel about Aum Shinrikyo? “Um Shin what-e-o?” Exactly. If I told you this is the name of the group who orchestrated the sarin gas attacks on the Tokyo subway which killed 12… I’m confident I could guess your stance, even (or especially) if you had not known about them before.

These are some of the more common responses to being asked how one feels about a foreign faith. The truth is, most people remain ignorant of beliefs outside of their own, and this is especially true of monotheists. Even though many of the organizations on that list are monotheistic off-shoots of major religions, members of the larger orthodoxy tend to either ignore or attack splinter groups.

My last question: how does a theist reconcile the silly stories and/or violence in one’s own religion, while these are enough to dismiss other faiths? Perhaps most monotheists can only judge a book by its cover. Hopefully, they close their Bibles and take a good hard look. [They won’t.]

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Explosive Science

Few people really appreciate the Dark Ages. Westerners are not taught about European history after the rise of Constantine. The 5th century until well after the 13th are the general dates given for the “Medieval” period, also called the “Middle Ages.” Not a lot of progress went on in Europe during this time. The only local inventions were various farming implements, primarily improvements on the plow (which is itself technology originally borrowed, possibly from Egypt or even further back to pre-historic India).

Westerners are never taught of the Islamic Renaissance that took place from the 8th century and extended well into the 15th. We learn little of the vast Chinese empires that rose and fell during this time. These two cultures produced the technology we take for granted, spurring the Renaissance in Europe.

Peaceful and violent interaction with Arabs during the late Middle Ages brought Europe not only the knowledge of these two great cultures, but also the lost “pagan” knowledge destroyed by the Christians in their rise to power. Our knowledge of Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, Euclid, Pythagoras, and many other Western philosophers was preserved by Muslim scholars for centuries.

Chinese paper allowed for the abandonment of expensive parchment and inferior papyrus. The printing press meant books could be reproduced without being rewritten by hand. Arabian optics allowed for the production of eyeglasses, telescopes, and (much later) microscopes. However, there is one invention of the Chinese that met with one field of Arabian science that changed history forever: gunpowder and alchemy.

Al-kimiya was a science the Muslims built out of the Greek study of khemeioa. The Greeks named it such after Egypt, known then as Khemia. Egyptians are the oldest recorded practitioners of alchemy. There, they created cosmetics, glass, dyes, inks, and papyrus. They also extracted metal from ore. This final task was vital, as it was the alchemists who made the Pharaohs wealthy. Alchemy was suppressed in Europe as witchcraft for centuries. All writings on the subject were destroyed, and we will never know how much or how little we lost.

The invention of gunpowder in China in the 9th century by Taoist monks took some time to reach Europe. Muslims are the first to adopt it in the West. It is recorded as being used in Spain against the Reconquista forces of Europe, who had rallied to fight off the Islamic Moors who controlled areas of the Iberian Pennisula, including Spain, Portugal, and even Sicily. The first Europeans to use gunpowder are Vikings (who traded with the Muslims), and the first Christian to write of it are Norwegian nobility in the 1250s. Both used it primarily for incendiary ship-to-ship warfare,

By around 1300, Christian monks began recording the recipe for gunpowder. Early on, it was hidden in anagrams or buried in long rhyming poems in order to conceal it and prevent charges of witchcraft (the latter technique is preserved in the portrayal of “witchcraft” as sing-songy, rhyming recipes, the only kind to survive the period).

Even after the utility of gunpowder is demonstrated, many religious authorities banned it on the same grounds they banned the use of crossbows: it was seen as barbaric that any common man could use such a weapon to kill a chivalrous, valiant knight. Those who did use it were often looked down upon, though success followed them. The first cannons are built by the craftsmen who made church bells. Leonardo Da Vinci dabbled in weapons blending all of the newly introduced technology, from gunpowder to improved metallurgy to mechanics.

However, one of the three ingredients in gunpowder was saltpeter, which was expensive and had to be imported… until Europeans found out they’d been throwing the stuff away for years. After learning an effective means for the production of saltpeter from animal dung, again from Arabic alchemists, Europe went off like a rocket.

More than changing the face of warfare, gunpowder established alchemy as an acceptable practice in Europe. The Dark Ages gave way to a Renaissance of exploring new ideas, questioning our views of the world we lived in. In time, gunpowder also provided the means for monarchies to be toppled, in favor of a Greek form of “pagan” governace: democracy.

Monday, March 15, 2010

A Weird Turn

I went to a private Catholic high school where the only atheists I knew were me and two of the girls I dated. It was not all Catholics, but it was predominantly Christian, with many denominations represented. There’s no way us three were the only atheists, but I only knew they were atheists because we were close enough to talk about it. This shows part of the problem.

Atheism was shunned at my school. No one was beat up over it, but there were altercations and times when things were thrown at me (nothing harmful), solely because I was an atheist or spoke up when I “shouldn’t uv.” Of course, there wasn’t much else about me worth mocking, and it certainly wasn’t a horrible daily routine. I didn’t feel persecuted or oppressed, but it was irritating how intrusive all the religious rituals, prayers, and other garbage could be for those of us who just wanted an education.

And God forbid you question anything. It wasn’t always teachers enforcing this stuff; it was usually students. There was strange Puritanical peer pressure. Let’s put it this way: my school was so conservative, I actually got made fun of once for PDA. Apparently hugging your girlfriend in the hall is inappropriate for 17 year olds. I was stuck living in the fucking 1950’s.

My school required we take a religion class every year. The first year was a comprehensive look at world religions, and the next three years were variously themed kumbayah sessions where we talked about our “spirituality.” This was basically an opportunity for the Christian majority to alienate anyone who didn’t agree with them in discussion. People of other religions spoke up without criticism, which is a good thing, but I was the only atheist out of over twenty kids in every one of the three years I faced this curriculum.

This was where I honed my chops. This is where I learned to stand up to a group of people and tell them point-blank to their face: you’re wrong. It’s really effortless online. I don’t even have to mask my contempt for you people (yeah I fucking said “you people,” you dirty, unwashed masses; go back to your fucking couches and reality shows if you have a fucking problem with it).

And it wasn’t easy. For one thing, I was newly skeptical. I wasn’t agnostic, but I was not completely sure of my atheism. All I knew was that I wasn’t Catholic, I felt nothing for any sort of personal God that my evangelical friends told me about, and Buddhism was for fags. Of course, those are my words then, not my words now… now I would say Buddhism is for “spiritual, but not religious” people (though one of my two Buddhist friends was gay).

What is the proper response when a teacher writes in your required diary entries which they “grade”: “Those who stand for nothing will surely fall for anything.” Nowadays, I would have told that bitch I won’t stand for that shit and that she can go sit and spin. Maybe if she didn’t drink, her son wouldn’t have been the weird kid who mutters to himself in the corner while banging his head against the wall. [True story.]

If you wonder why I’m not civil and polite and patient and kind when speaking on matters of faith, it may have something to do with the fact that I was “Heil Hitler” saluted by another student in an “Ethics” themed class discussion. The topic? Abortion. Apparently supporting a woman’s right to control her own body is tantamount to a fetal Holocaust. Never mind their laughable support of the racially biased genocide they euphemize as “capital punishment,” or the actual defense of the Vietnam War that I heard stuttered through countless ums and likes.

I’ve not only peaked inside the Christian world, I leered at it day after day from across the table. I didn’t have my thumb on the pulse of Conservative America, I had my needle in its vein. I got a real good sample, and I am torn between terror and violent outrage at the extremist douchebags that the conservative right not only harbors, but encourages. The Right makes things personal, and turns out… it worked.

Fuck political correctness. Fuck the Democrats who want to negotiate. The Right is claiming the Democrats are shoving healthcare down our throats. Great! If I were the Dems, I’d not only shove it down their throat, I’d grease them up, stick it in their asses, and I certainly wouldn’t forget to pull their hair.

For fuck’s sake, why do we bother to elect Democrats if they don’t do a damn thing? When these pussies got picked on, they’re the ones who cowered in a corner and told themselves the bullies were just compensating for something. These guys are such bleeding-heart push-overs, they have sympathy for their tormenters. That is way too Jesus-y for me. What you’re supposed to do is kick the bully in the balls, sleep with his girlfriend, and pour sugar in his car’s gas tank. If you don’t want to cook, get the fuck out of the kitchen. You gotta break a few eggs to make a fucking omelet, and maybe some of those eggs were just for fun.

This whole post seems like the situation of my generation. Everything seemed fairly focused, but it really takes a weird turn and now I have no idea what to do. I feel like this might be generation “I’m angry and I don’t know what to do.”

Friday, March 12, 2010

Don’t Look Back…

Religion has so much to offer me, though not salvation, or ethics, or community. No, religion provides me the creative fodder I need to write. I like to take a fresh look through new, child-like eyes at religious ideas left unexamined.

Why does heaven have pearly gates? I don’t mean, why are they pearl (though that is its own question). Rather, are there drifters loitering outside trying to get in? Why not build heaven in a nicer part of the universe, away from the riff raff? What if the gates are not to keep people out, but to keep people in…

But I have largely grown bored with Christian mythology. There’s only one god, and the angels are pretty ho-hum. So long ago, I moved on to other religions. As it turns out, most religions believe in some form of reincarnation. The idea of the soul returning to Earth after death was described by the Greeks, Romans, and several Eastern religions.

Plato relied heavily on the idea of the “transmigration of souls” (metempsychosis, which was introduced earlier by Orphism and Pythagoreanism). This idea was essential to Plato’s conception of knowledge. Plato believed all souls spend time in another plane of existence, inhabited by what he called perfect forms. There, our souls soak up knowledge like a sponge. It would be akin to your soul being plugged into an encyclopedia.

The soul then drinks from the River Lethe (meaning “forgetfulness” or “concealment”), causing us to temporarily forget, and we are born again as a baby. To Plato, nothing is ever “learned” during life. Instead, we merely “remember” or “recall” during our mortal lives the things we knew as immortal souls. In Plato’s estimation, we are all repositories of infinite knowledge, waiting to be unlocked. The very Greek word for “truth” was “aletheia,” meaning “unforget” or “unconceal.”

This is a romantic notion, but it is never enough for me to hear a story. I have to think of ways to add on to the established ideas. Moreover, other religions which espouse reincarnation have completely different dogma regarding the cycle of the soul. However, all of these models had a few things in common:

1. The soul is eternal
2. The soul is indivisible
3. The role of gods in the entire cycle is ambiguous

The first two points create a great crisis of internal logic, and this is already assuming the existence souls and the occurrence of reincarnation. There are almost 7 billion people. Right away, we have to assume animals and humans are coming from the same reincarnation pool or someone, somewhere is creating human souls from scratch. If the latter is true, then some souls are older (and therefore “more eternal”) than others.

If we’re using the same souls as animals, there are a lot of souls waiting to get back to Earth, because the number of animals in the wild who have died is greater than the population increase of humans and our domesticated animals (whose population also rises and falls with our own). That is, unless we can be reincarnated as microscopic life… in which case the calculations are too difficult for me to do, as there are trillions of non-human microbes living inside just one human body. And what about plants?

Why not simplify the whole matter and say that souls are divisible? My body may be like a glass, and my soul the water inside it. The glass was made recently, but the water always existed. When the glass breaks, the water won’t disappear; it will evaporate into the clouds or run down a drain or into the soil or trickle into a larger body of water. The exact glass of water can never be re-assembled again. I imagine that is a far more likely scenario than a soul being able to maintain itself as a whole.

Of course, the soul need not do anything. One should not forget the gods when discussing religion. What is their role in all of this?

Since religion is supposedly revealed by the gods, and the role of the gods is largely ignored in all reincarnation systems, I have come to the conclusion that the only logical explanation is that the gods are taking advantage of our souls somehow. The simplest solution is that they are eating our souls, perhaps this is even what gives them immortality, though I would not be surprised if the human soul is far less powerful, and is used for something rather frivolous (perhaps getting high).

Is it so crazy to assume the gods are exploiting the human soul? If we are their creation, and if the apple indeed does not fall far from the tree, it seems not only possible, but likely. Human beings think nothing about whom they hurt, why should the gods be any different? Quite frankly, we may be nothing more than cattle to them. Really puts the “fishers of men” and “shepherd” metaphors into context…

When someone asks me what happens when we die, I optimistically suggest that it will be like before we were born: nothing to us, but exciting for everyone alive (we get his stuff!). This is quite optimistic, at least when compared to my proposed scenario in which the soul is consumed by gods and shat back to Earth. I can’t know what happens when we die, but I find it very intellectually lazy of people to assume it’s either heaven and hell, or nothing.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Too Good To Be True

Rush Limbaugh is already dashing my hopes this morning by saying he didn’t actually mean he would leave the country if healthcare reform passed. Rush must have no control over what he actually says… judge from the audio yourself:

Don’t get excited. Rush is already claiming this morning he would only leave for medical care. Hmm… what are the odds a tubby pill-head will have medical problems?

But I have to ask… why Costa Rica? Is it the tropical weather? The beautiful island landscapes unsullied by pollution? Maybe it’s the fact that Costa Rica scored just above the US in the World Health Organization’s ranking of health systems? Or… is it just the last country without socialized medicine which is not in perpetual poverty or civil war?

Rush probably took back his comments when he realized he sounded like a whiney liberal under Bush… or maybe it was the realization that there is no convenient place welcoming of his ideas. Liberals can just hop the border into Canada. Poor Rush has to take a long plane ride. Do you know how hard it is to hide pills in your carry-on these days? I bet Rush couldn’t keister even a day’s worth on the regimen he’s worked himself up to (which explains his grudge against tolerance).

Why not move to Costa Rica? Why don’t all of the conservatives in America just up and leave? Live out your Ayn Rand fantasy of leaving us foolish liberals to fail, wallowing in our ignorance, while the hard-working backbone of society forms a utopia far, far away. The farther, the better.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Those Aren't Skeletons In His Closet...

Move over Larry Craig, your airport bathroom cruising is old news. Meet Roy Ashburn, Republican state senator out of California.

Roy voted against homosexual rights throughout his 14 year career. So imagine the surprise of his constituents when he was arrested for DUI… after leaving a gay nightclub. Did I mention the male passenger? Perhaps Roy was just shuttling the endangered young man to a Bible study group…

The divorced father of four admitted to a Bakersfield radio station that he is homosexual.

No one is talking about what I am appalled about. No, not the hypocrisy (I’m used to that now). Why is a state senator driving while intoxicated? You can’t pony up the cash for a taxi? Afraid someone will recognize your car parked in the lot? I hate people who are too stupid to properly plan their recreational activities. Also, if you have to get hammered before having sex with a guy, maybe you aren’t really gay.

Roy Ashburn: proving once again you can lie through your teeth with a cock in your mouth.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

The End of an Era

I’ve decided to end the series now that I’ve come to the 100th “Funny Bible Quote” (though with the unnumbered Christmas quote, it comes to 101). Some were indeed funny, others were just stupid or offensive or ridiculous. Hopefully everyone reading my blog learned something about the Bible and the prejudiced, bronze age fools who composed it.

I can’t begin it just yet, but I may start a “Funny Quran Quote” segment. You see, I found a site called which allows you to fill out a quick online form and receive a free Quran in the mail. So, if you really like holy documents being taken out of context, stay tuned!

Monday, March 8, 2010

WTF Moment of the Month

[Thanks to PF at Forever in Hell for pointing this out...]

The following quotes are my favorite from the blog post titled “SLAVERY IS NOT WRONG.”

If slavery is wrong, then wives should not submit to their husbands, children should not obey parents, women should became equal to men and preach in churches ( which is forbidden in the bible by the way), and mostly no one should call Jesus their master or submit to the authority of God.


I do not believe slavery is wrong, because a) The bible does not condemn slavery and b) Slavery makes so much sense and to say slavery is wrong we rob the gospel off its meaning and even Election. The concept of total submission and slavery is at the very heart of Christ's gospel.
Any guesses on the demographics of the poster? If you guessed black female, you’re correct. You can read the whole post here.

Funny Bible Quote #100

And if you ask yourself,
"Why has this happened to me?"—
it is because of your many sins
that your skirts have been torn off
and your body mistreated.

Can the Ethiopian change his skin
or the leopard its spots?
Neither can you do good
who are accustomed to doing evil.

"I will scatter you like chaff
driven by the desert wind.

This is your lot,
the portion I have decreed for you,"
declares the Lord,
"because you have forgotten me
and trusted in false gods.

I will pull up your skirts over your face
that your shame may be seen-

your adulteries and lustful neighings,
your shameless prostitution!
I have seen your detestable acts
on the hills and in the fields.
Woe to you, O Jerusalem!
How long will you be unclean?"

~ Jeremiah 13:22-27, NIV

Sunday, March 7, 2010

“Real” Christianity

There’s two kinds of blame: warranted and unwarranted. We blame Hitler for the holocaust, though he didn’t kill a single Jew with his own hands. Still, it is safe to say that blaming Hitler for the Holocaust is warranted, since he ordered it. The individuals who perpetrated the actual crimes (i.e. “got their hands dirty”) are also to blame. Some may say they are even less guilty than Hitler himself, as theirs might be said to be a crime of ignorant obedience. One might even make the case that Germany itself is to blame, but it would be unwarranted to blame every individual German for the Holocaust.

Christians sometimes think of themselves as one large cohesive unit. “The majority of Americans are Christian,” they’ll say… when convenient. Christians actually divide themselves up into small groups which get along about as well as cats and mice. “Catholics are nothing but pagans,” evangelicals say amongst themselves, while the Catholics retort that “Protestants follow false prophets and doctrines.” “Yeah well, as least we don’t worship Mary!”

And don’t even get Christians started on Nazis; they will not even admit Hitler was a Christian. Nevermind the Iron Cross on every military vehicle the Nazis commissioned. Nevermind Hitler’s fascination with Christian relics ranging from the Spear of Destiny to the Holy Grail (and you thought it was just fictional “Indiana Jones” stuff?). Nevermind Hitler’s own autobiography, Mein Kampf, which makes numerous Biblical allusions. Nevermind first-hand accounts of his religiosity, such as this quote from his maid:

“I didn’t have to be a Nazi party member or anything. After a while I relaxed a bit. Apparently it was Hitler’s orders that Anni [her sister] and I be taken to church every Sunday because he thought this would be ‘good for us.’”

More important to be Christian than a Nazi… hmm…

I don’t know why Christians bend over backwards to avoid taking credit for Hitler. They have so many other despots, from Theodosius I to Napoleon, what’s one more? Atheists don’t try to claim Mao Zedong, Stalin, Lenin, or Pol Pot were actually religious, nor do they have to. Every tree has its share of bad apples.

This isn't good enough for Christians, who engage in a practice I call “exclusionary Christianity.” They will refer to someone as “not really Christian” when they mean that person is an “embarrassing Christian.” Christians try to claim a bad person is not actually a Christian at all… while simultaneously claiming that every Christian is a hopeless sinner. I guess there’s some magical point where one goes from being just a normal, sinful Christian to being an exiled false Christian - that point being solely up to the judgmental attitude of others. I wonder who handles all of these individualized excommunications…

What really irritates us atheists is when a Christian does or says something in the Bible… and other Christians rush to claim that person is not really a Christian. What Christians really mean when they say this is, “I choose to ignore that part of Christianity, and I think Christians who support that part of Christianity are wrong.”

Think Pat Robertson, who is quite accurate in his understanding of the Bible’s explanation of natural disasters as being the result of sins committed by a nation (though the specific details he outlined are dubious at best). I’m glad there are Christians out there who oppose the death sentence for homosexuals and women who have extra-marital sex. But at some point, Christians with functioning logic and reading comprehension skills need to see their religion for what it is: nothing but 2000 year old philosophy peppered with all the ignorance and prejudice of the bronze age.

It is not the fault of every Christian when one among them sins, but to say there is some sort of farcical Christianity out there that people are pretending to be, giving “real” Christians a bad name, is ludicrous to the point of schizophrenia. Some people just follow the Bible differently… some might say “more accurately.”

Funny Bible Quote #99

Do not take advantage of a widow or an orphan. If you do and they cry out to me, I will certainly hear their cry. My anger will be aroused, and I will kill you with the sword; your wives will become widows and your children fatherless.

~ Exodus 22:22-24, NIV

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Her Fault...

The most common argument I hear in “defense” of religion is that religion has good intentions and isn’t hurting anyone. If reading something like this doesn’t make you want to slap the person you wrote the pamphlet, you’re part of the problem.

A young woman doing her job at a drive-thru window was handed a pamphlet by a woman in a car. Among the quotes from the pamphlet:

- “You may have been given this leaflet because of the way you are dressed. Have you thought about standing before the true and living God to be judged?”
-“Scripture tells us that when a man looks on a woman to lust for her he has already committed adultery in his heart. If you are dressed in a way that tempts a men to do this secret (or not so secret) sin, you are a participant in the sin.”
- “By the way, some rape victims would not have been raped if they had dressed properly. So can we really say they were innocent victims?”

I think a rape victim given this pamphlet should be allowed to legally rip the face off of the person who hands it to them.

If you blame rape on a woman's appearance, please move to the Middle East. They already harbor attitudes like that over there. You won’t have to lobby for any kind of changes to society; women are required by law in many places to cover up modestly. The women also “know their place” over there, and everyone is really into God.

Christians: your religion is completely fucked.

Funny Bible Quote #98

And the Lord was with Judah; and he drave out the inhabitants of the mountain; but could not drive out the inhabitants of the valley, because they had chariots of iron.

~ Judges 1:19, KJV

Friday, March 5, 2010


Human beings are in a perpetual state of war. Even if every person were able to get along, we would still be at war.

Perhaps it isn’t very “liberal” of me, but I perceive nature as the enemy. I don’t like trees. I think Arbor Day and Earth Day are the worst holidays ever (they don’t even have sales). I think camping is just white people pretending to “rough it” by wasting hundreds of dollars on equipment they use once or twice a year.

I also don’t find wildlife to be fascinating enough to risk being attacked. Isn’t that why I have Animal Planet? Quite frankly, I wouldn’t be upset if every living thing were in a zoo or on the menu (though I think the Earth would technically become unlivable if this were to literally happen).

In short, I think the human race is at war with nature. On the whole, we’ve subdued it, and in many respects enslaved it to do our bidding. The occasional earthquake, hurricane, tornado, hail storm, lightning bolt, or even killer whale attack are nature’s obligatory swipes in the ongoing battle, but for the most part we live in complete contempt of the most basic aspects of nature… or do we?

There are still basic natural limitations with which humanity must wrestle. Aging comes to mind; disease is another. In fact, the human body is itself a natural limitation. Then there’s the fact that we live on a doomed planet. Either you believe our own opulence will wipe us off the face of the earth, or some other calamity such as interstellar collision, volcanic eruption, or even the inevitable solar life cycle which will result in the Earth being engulfed by the sun billions of years from now. We are at war with time (but it sometimes seems to take a while to strike…).

Despite all these common enemies, we still manage to fight amongst ourselves. Even with the enemy beating at the gate, we engage ourselves in civil disputes over meaningless drivel. We economically exploit each other; we violently abuse each other; we spread lies about each other so it is easier to send our young ones off to fight each other in far-flung regions of the globe.

Why do we bicker over resources which are limited when we live in a vast universe appears devoid of living competition, yet full of the very chemicals over which we kill and maim? Moreover, we are not even using the resources we have to their highest potential. Harnessing the power of the sun, wind, ocean currents, and even nuclear fission can all be implemented, and yet we dally about while happily shelling out billions to finite energy sources. We might as well plan for the day we run out of oil, gas and coal, be that decades, centuries, or even millennia from now.

We’re at war with inevitability, and it’s not a question of which side you’re on. All of humanity is stuck fighting against nature, so allegiance is unquestionable. We must see ourselves as what we are, creatures of a day working towards the lifetime of our species. Our success – and failure – may come down to a decision of whether we choose to compete or cooperate. Are we better off wasting energy sabotaging our own side in our attempt to be team captain?

In war, the side divided against itself is always doomed to defeat.

Funny Bible Quote #97

Give them, O Lord: what wilt thou give? Give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts.

~ Hosea 9:14, KJV

Thursday, March 4, 2010

*Ring* *Ring*

Sometimes I wonder if the world is in fact listening to my thoughts for the sole purpose of proving me wrong. I had just written a note to myself yesterday morning:

“A recent Pew Poll finds that 100% of Americans have a landline phone.”

This is of course a joke on the fact that phone surveys are done over landlines. Imagine my complete shock when I got a call last night as I was making dinner from a number I didn’t recognize...

“Hello, may I speak to ‘Ginx’ please.”

“This is ‘Ginx.’”

“Hi ‘Ginx,’ do you have a few minutes to answer some questions for a telephone survey?”

I am in the habit of picking up numbers I don’t recognize because I get a lot of wrong numbers (I think a car repair place has the same number as me, only off by 1, because I get questions about mufflers and radiators and engine parts on a weekly basis, often in my voicemail). Even if I’m “busy,” I have a few moments to help someone sort out which number they’re actually trying to reach.

But this… this is the motherload! How often do you get someone actually asking your opinion? Most of us just post it on the internet, where our opinions are immortalized in a format which can be eternally ignored. And it was a political pollster to boot!

I was excited. So I turned off the stove and let the taco meat sit there for a while as I answered questions. They asked me about local politicians I had never heard of at first, but it slowly moved into more familiar politicians and issues. I gave Barack Obama a “fair” rating, which was between “good” and “bad.” This was generous of me, but I had to consider the fact that Obama actually did some things:

- Signing a law which enables women who allege pay discrimination to sue their employer
- Lifting the Bush restrictions on federally funded embryonic stem cell research
- Approving 2,500 highway projects, which will create 260,000 jobs in all fifty states

There’s a few other minor accomplishments, though they are not the reason he was elected. I seriously considered giving him a bad rating because of his policy in Afghanistan/Pakistan, and the fact that he just brushes off the Drug War is ignorant and disheartening. Perhaps my standards after Bush are just embarrassingly low. Between “Very good, Good, Fair, Bad, or Very Bad,” I think fair is still simultaneously the best and worst he could possibly deserve.

She also asked how I felt about issues like abortion, which I’m all for. I have abortions before breakfast (over easy). She also read aloud some political ads. I seriously laughed out loud during the Republican one. “[My opponent] has applied for every elected office in Pennsylvania…” So he’s persistent and has experience? This is a bad thing? No offense, but the only professional I respect for having less experience is a whore… which I assume includes this particular Republican… but I still went with the Dem.

The problem is, there were only two issues I recall being specifically asked about: Obama and abortion. Everything else was just “do you prefer A or B.” This dichotomous system has some flaws. Let me give you a non-political example:

“Which would you rather eat, gum that your wife just spit out or lead paint chips?”

“…I guess the gum.”

“Alright. Now, would you consider yourself more of a hater of cats or a lover of walruses?”

“… Well I don’t hate cats, so I guess… lover of walruses?”

Sometimes you just don’t like either choice, and sometimes you feel strongly about one and nothing for the other, and yet have implied preference for such. Then there’s the third situation, which happened to me. I was actually asked which I agreed with more, the 2nd amendment or a woman’s right to choose. I went with the woman’s right to choose, but it’s not like I oppose gun ownership. If I had to choose, I’d rather live in a world where guns were outlawed than a world where abortion was outlawed, but I think we should just go on living in one with both.

So now that I’ve been polled, I have to wonder… why are they designed so poorly, and when did they start gaining access to cell phones?

Funny Bible Quote #96

Blows and wounds cleanse away evil, and beatings purge the inmost being.

~ Proverbs 20:30, NIV

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Even More Random Thoughts

If you spray bug repellant on an insect, does it just become really unpopular?

There is a very fine line between camping and homelessness.

You ever take acid and get into a debate about whether the soul is a solid, liquid, gas or plasma? Yeah, me neither…

They call common people “the salt of the earth” because if you salt the the earth, nothing good ever grows there again.

Satan follows the trail of money when he comes to claim you. Satan lives in your Sunday best.

New York has so much diversity. You can go out on the street and there will be people of every ethnicity and language telling you to “fuck off.”

Do deaf people ever sign in their sleep?

John McCain’s mom is so old she can remember when horses were domesticated.

Why do Christians bury the dead if they believe hell is underground?

After 2012, be ready for 2060. This is the year Newton predicted for the end of times.

I took Spanish and French in school, but the closest I come to understanding another language is when I read an analog clock, especially if it’s in Roman numerals.

We call what is happening right now “the present” because it is like a gift: you have no control over what it will be, you rarely get what you want, and you usually enjoyed the anticipation more.

Religion was the cradle of philosophy, but how long can one be expected to stay in a cradle?

Every fool sincerely hopes that the problems caused by knowledge can be cured with ignorance, for what choice does he have?

Baracknophobia = the irrational fear that Obama will spin a web of tyranny

Chief Smackaho = Native American rapper

I don’t know why religious people call it “apologetics.” They never apologize for all the shitty things religion has done. If anything, they almost seem to be defending religion… they should call it “unapologetics.”

By Fortuna’s whim, fools advance
Tethered to the wheel of Chance

There are 2900 different species of snakes, and that’s not even counting politicians and bankers.

Funny Bible Quote #95

When you march up to attack a city, make its people an offer of peace. If they accept and open their gates, all the people in it shall be subject to forced labor and shall work for you. If they refuse to make peace and they engage you in battle, lay siege to that city. When the Lord your God delivers it into your hand, put to the sword all the men in it. As for the women, the children, the livestock and everything else in the city, you may take these as plunder for yourselves. And you may use the plunder the Lord your God gives you from your enemies. This is how you are to treat all the cities that are at a distance from you and do not belong to the nations nearby.

However, in the cities of the nations the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance, do not leave alive anything that breathes. Completely destroy them—the Hittites, Amorites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites—as the Lord your God has commanded you. Otherwise, they will teach you to follow all the detestable things they do in worshiping their gods, and you will sin against the Lord your God.

~ Deuteronomy 20:10-18, NIV

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

More Random Thoughts

Barack Hussein Obama anagrams:
Bob’s Marihuana Cakes
Bareback Human Oasis (band name, or gentleman's club)
Anarchism: Bake us a B.O.
Anarchism: use a kabob
Ciao Bush, Smear a Bank
Smack a Ho, Brain Abuse
*A Moan* Bush Era Is Back

Truth is mightier than the gods, for truth persists even when we stop believing.

The system tells us to not blame the system. They want to blame bad apples, even though the problem is the barrel.

Iceburging: the game teenagers play that isn’t ACTUALLY having sex, dubbed “iceburging” because it’s “just the tip.”

Can God create a rock so large not even He can move it? I think so, since I can close a two-liter bottle of soda so tight not even I can open it.

Republicans have some big balls, but Democrats don’t have the balls to point out that they’re so big, it’s unhealthy. Republicans essentially suffer from elephantiasis.

Covetol: the pill to prevent communism

“Quiet Observation” is the first chapter in the Book of Wisdom.

America does not have a democracy, or rule of the majority. Instead, we have rule by the majority of those deluded enough to believe Democrats and Republicans are different, or as I like to call it, an “ignorocracy.”

Let your mind always remain open, so that even if a bad idea enters, it may exit just as easily.

The religious choose to believe a lie that rhymes with the truth.

Might does not make right, Might merely gets his way until he is killed in his sleep.

My mom and I always had a weird relationship, like landlord and tenant. I guess it goes back to when I was living in her womb. I was born via Caesarian section. So of course, I didn’t get my deposit back.

Analogy of the day:
Darwinism : Social Darwinism : : Scientist : Christian Scientist

If all the world’s a stage, where was I during rehearsal?

Things are so much more simple than we wish they were.

Some may wonder how I come up with a new ridiculous Bible quote every single day, but I wonder how people are able to find anything useful or inspirational between all the nonsense.

Patriotism: waving American flags with “Made in China” printed on them.

Funny Bible Quote #94

If you buy a Hebrew servant, he is to serve you for six years. But in the seventh year, he shall go free, without paying anything. If he comes alone, he is to go free alone; but if he has a wife when he comes, she is to go with him. If his master gives him a wife and she bears him sons or daughters, the woman and her children shall belong to her master, and only the man shall go free.

But if the servant declares, 'I love my master and my wife and children and do not want to go free,' then his master must take him before the judges. He shall take him to the door or the doorpost and pierce his ear with an awl. Then he will be his servant for life.

If a man sells his daughter as a servant, she is not to go free as menservants do.

~ Exodus 21:2-7, NIV

Monday, March 1, 2010

Random Thoughts

Men don’t treat women like objects, we treat them like people we want to fuck. If women can’t see the difference, that’s their problem. Some females say men treat women like objects because they’re projecting; women often do look at men as a “piece of meat,” and it’s even common for women to make a practice of using objects for sexual gratification. Men rarely use objects. We prefer people (or our own human hand). Hence, it is women who objectify for the purposes of sex, not men.

I love how sports drinks and men’s deoderant have the same names. Usually two words, a chilly adjective and a noun. “Arctic Refresh,” “Fresh Blast,” “Frost Glacier,” “Fierce Melon.”

We should put Bush on the trillion dollar bill. I mean, we already associate him with trillion dollar bills, so why not make it official?

I’m pretty sure the spot in our brains that stores economic theory is the same spot that stores ethics, and it’s not that big.

I think the phrase “within an inch of your/his/her life” is inaccurate. Shouldn’t it be “within an inch of their death”? If it was within an inch of their life, that means they were just short of living. “Yeah, they got him good. They beat him within an inch of his life. If they’d hit him just one more time, he’d have probably survived.”

Ninjavitis = the leading cause of tooth loss among martial artists

Nearvana = getting distracted at the last second before achieving enlightenment

Dramakaze = causing a scene at a public event while taking someone down with you

Superegotism = cultural bias

A bold mistake is no more noble than a sheepish one, and twice as difficult to correct.

I see ads online for sites claiming to be the Facebook and MySpace of sex. Isn’t that what Facebook and MySpace already are?

If your cup if half empty, pour it into a smaller glass.

Some music just sounds better than it actually is.

Truth emerges despite persecution. In fact, persecution is the fertilizer in which truth grows. Just at the point when we’re drowning in all the crap, we discover consensus. It’s easy for everyone to see eye to eye when we’re neck-deep in shit. Truth does not fail under criticism, it prevails because of it.

Oxymoron of the day: “business class”

There’s nothing wrong with sex on the TV, but I don’t know how people balance on those new flat screens.

Thanks to marketing, no one needs to make the products you want, they just get you to want the products they make.

Overheard on the street: “I’m as queer as a football bat!”

If you’ve never read the Bible, I recommend it… even though Christians ruined the ending by going public with it.

Consolidation is tyranny. Dispersing power over many people is democracy, not “big government.”

You know when it is you stop growing up and start growing old? When the pictures your friends post to Facebook go from drunken parties and concerts to wedding photos and pictures of kids.

New change to the pledge of allegiance: “…with liberty and justice, for all we know.”

I think there’s too much doubt these days, but I can’t be sure.

Maybe none of this would have happened if up was down.

How many nightmares does your dream cost?

My mind rejects religion,
Or is my soul allergic to superstition?

Statistics show that 4 out of 10 Americans suffer from depression; the other 6 just deal with it.

Have you ever noticed people who think with their gut usually have their head up their ass?

I don’t trust Barack Obama’s white half.

Neither of my parents are more than 50% of any one ethnicity. I don’t consider myself part of any race, but that’s mostly because I hate running.

I’m unemployed, which is the atheist equivalent of being a monk. I find myself living off the kindness of others, and I therefore find myself encouraging kindness in others.

Ideas for businesses:
- Alcohol Pills: They’re what ales you!
- My own line of blacktie formal wear: It’s not a tuxedo, it’s a “Succeedo!”
- Christ Crisps: potato chips with an image of Jesus burned into each one. Buy a bag full of miracles today!
[Notice all the exclamation points... you have to seem excited in advertising]

Funny Bible Quote #93

Your male and female slaves are to come from the nations around you; from them you may buy slaves. You may also buy some of the temporary residents living among you and members of their clans born in your country, and they will become your property. You can will them to your children as inherited property and can make them slaves for life, but you must not rule over your fellow Israelites ruthlessly.

~ Leviticus 25:44-46, KJV
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