Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Top Ten: Things That Happened This Morning Before My Ten Hour Drive Home

10. Car wouldn’t start
9. Dog, Barkley, escaped
8. Wife scraped face on branch while recovering dog
7. Mom, wife and myself locked out of house
6. Max, the less well-behaved dog, locked inside
5. Mom’s friend lost spare key
4. Father has to drive 40 minutes from work with key
3. Max pooped in the house
2. Max stepped in poop and tracked it through the house
1. Missed McDonald’s breakfast


  1. !0. What? Dead battery?

    9. A new act you can exploit for profit? Houdini Dog!

    8. At least she didn't poke her eye out!

    7. That's happened to me. I was tempted to break a window, but just smashed the crappy lock with a rock. How the hell do three people lock themselves out?

    6. Max? That's the Grinch's dog! No wonder trouble was brewing!

    5. How convenient!

    4. Recently I broke a car key off in the trunk lock, and mom had to drive %0 miles with key!

    3. Where do you want him to poop, outside? Where do you poop? I thought so!

    2. I've done that before.

    1. That was a close one! I'm happy you were spared.

  2. On #7: the lock started catching and locking when the door was opened (it's a lock on the door knob, not a deadbolt) and all three of us had run out to grab the dog and shut the door behind us to keep the other dog from running out too.

  3. LOL Sounds like a Chevy Chase movie. Well, 9 out of 10 isn't bad (you missed being poisoned at McDonald's). Can't wait to hear about the 10-hour drive.

  4. I can wait, Mr. Charleston, I can wait...


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