Saturday Reflection August 25th, 2012

Planning is for people who want to be prepared for the predictable.

Saturday Reflection August 18th, 2012

Sometimes, the only way to show you how much you love doing something is to stop doing it and see how much you miss it.

Saturday Reflection August 11th, 2012

I don’t believe in hating broad groups of people. I believe you should hate someone as an individual, for unique and personal reasons. You should really get to know a person before you hate them.

Saturday Reflection August 4th, 2012

It’s funny to me how some people assume that because I’m joking, I’m not being serious, as if the two must be mutually exclusive.

Saturday Reflection July 28th, 2012

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but insults just arouse me.

Saturday Reflection 7/21/12

Childhood Leukemia is proof that if God exists, He hates us very much.

Saturday Reflection 7/14/12

Isn’t it a strange coincidence that those who believe in ghosts see ghosts, those who believe in leprechauns see leprechauns, those who believe in dragons see dragons, those who believe in demons see demons, those who believe in angels see angels, those who believe in aliens see aliens, those who believe in Bigfoot see Bigfoot, and those who believe in God see God. Personally, I believe everything is funny, and I have found this to be true. It’s almost like we only find what it is we’re looking for in the world.

Saturday Reflection #89

No matter what happens from now until the end the time, America will always be the country that first landed on the moon and that invented the electric chair.

Saturday Reflection #88

When it comes to censorship, I have a very simple philosophy. Writers and speakers have rights; readers and listeners do not.

Saturday Reflection #87

I genuinely feel bad for Christians sometimes. For example, they believe that they are so horrible, that their God had to kill himself. It’s kind of sad.

Saturday Reflection #86

One advantage of having sex with an elderly woman is that when you 69, you can suck on her tits.

Saturday Reflection #85

Everyone knows how easy it is to make someone believe a lie, yet it’s difficult to get anyone to realize they have fallen for one.

Saturday Reflection #84

If you act, you will beat fate every time. Fate will win only if you do nothing.

Saturday Reflection #83

Some people want to convince you that no one needs the government to tell them what to do. The problem is, it is not a matter of whether people need to be led, but whether people can be led. Unfortunately, so many are inclined to follow that it is best to allow everyone a say in who is leading, even though most of us are just looking for a leader who will stay out of our way.

Saturday Reflection #82

If you look past the semantics and superficial differences, you will see that deep down, all religions want the same thing: for everyone to shut the fuck up and do as they say.

Saturday Reflection #81

You look pretty stupid if you act offended when someone mistakes your horseshit for bullshit.

Saturday Reflection #80

Getting a tattoo used to mean you were tough or a rebel. Now it means you want to read me some poetry about injustice to whales or that you drank a lot in college.

Saturday Reflection #79

The one who speaks the least often says the most.

Saturday Reflection #78

There are two ways to fix stupidity: silence and curiosity. The former just treats the symptoms, but the latter can cure it.

Saturday Reflection #77

Religion tried to convince me that no good ever came from asking questions. Actually, this is partially correct. The truth is, no good ever came. Good is sought after or achieved, it doesn’t just come. Good is a goal, not a consequence.