Thursday, March 1, 2012

Snippet: Speaking Ill of the Dead

Conservative asshole Andrew Breitbart died at 43 today of “natural causes.” To be fair, cocaine is derived from a plant, so I guess that counts.

Some people may criticize me for speaking ill of the dead, but why? If anything, you shouldn’t speak ill of the living, because a person who is still alive can turn their life around. Once you’re dead, we can examine your entire body of work, and you cannot correct it, alter it, fix it, change it, spin it, or deny it. If anything, the dead are the only people you should ever judge (even God is with me on that one).

21 comments:

  1. I'll reserve judgement until you pass away. I do hope, Bret, you manage to turn your life around.

    Are biscuits and gravy a natural substance?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'll reserve judgement until you pass away.

      I'm sure you won't have to wait that long.

      Are biscuits and gravy a natural substance?

      Have you not heard of the biscuit bush and the gravy tree?

      Delete
  2. The people who say "don't judge the dead" really only say that when they know the person in question can't be defended. Look at Jerry Falwell, a disgusting, bigoted toad of a man who sadly cannot go to hell because it does not exist. Christopher Hitchens bravely went against the Fox News losers in 2007 and boldly proclaimed that Falwell was a racist, a homophobe, a liar, and a fraud. Of course, all Sean Hannity had to say at the time was that Hitchens was being "mean." Well, guess what? Falwell was mean. Andrew Breitbart was mean. They deserve nothing more than hatred, and I hate them just as much now that they're dead then when they were alive.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Liberals" are always so full of hate, as you have so eloquently demonstrated.

      Delete
    2. I think hating evil is a good thing.

      Delete
    3. From Wikipedia "In the hours immediately following Senator Ted Kennedy's death, Breitbart called Kennedy a "villain", a "duplicitous bastard", a "prick" and "a special pile of human excrement."

      Delete
    4. Liberals hate individuals, conservatives hate faceless groups. I think one of those is more fair than the other.

      Delete
    5. I think hating evil is a good thing.

      And that's why I hate phony liberals like you, Muffin.

      Delete
    6. How can you hate a muffin? Is this some sort of cupcake conspiracy?

      Delete
    7. Muffins are a killer species. Don't you know anything?

      Delete
    8. You clearly have prejudice against muffins, you bakist!

      Delete
    9. Wait... maybe it's bake-ist?

      Delete
    10. Actually, I am a bakist/bake-ist. Or am I an anti-pastryist?

      Delete
    11. http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/blogs/taibblog/andrew-breitbart-death-of-a-douche-20120301

      Delete
    12. Fake Liberal Muffin, the difference is, Ted Kennedy really was a pile of human excrement.

      Delete
  3. I agree wholeheartedly, sometime the people who die are ASSHOLES. Brietbart was an asshole.

    ReplyDelete
  4. one of my OTD friends was like "There IS a god after all!"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. If it had been Rush Limbaugh, I might agree (like, Limbaugh 20 years ago).

      Delete
    2. That's what I think we should be saving the champagne in our fridge for: Limbaugh's death.

      Delete
  5. He died of heart problems he had for years, and he had a wife and kids. You should be ashamed of yourself for making libelous claims about a man you know nothing about.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Heart problems, you say? Oh right, because he didn't have one.

      Delete

If your comment is too long, break it into multiple comments and post them all.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...