I sat down last night to watch Obama speak. Here are the complete and unedited notes I took:
- Purple = Red + Blue + Gay Metaphor
- Obama is not a great orator. He only seems to be when compared to Bush.
- Obama is not black. He only seems to be when compared to Bush.
- Obama is so white, he’s not even brown (except his nose).
- Begin by quoting history… you’re losing them, Obama.
- Please stop naming specific towns, it’s almost as annoying as all the specific people’s names used on the campaign trail (“Bob Shitkicker from North Carolina said…” who cares…).
- You and everyone hated the bailout… yet you passed it because it was necessary… without explaining why. Maybe because the truth would be too sad: “We had to, or none of us would be able to fund our next campaign.”
- Geithner looks like he’s some sort of Middle Earth hybrid, the outcome of Gollum raping an elf.
- Republicans sit during “Remove tax breaks from companies that ship jobs overseas” standing ovation. Real Americans…
- Republicans lead the standing ovation for nuclear power and off-shore drilling.
- Alito makes comment during standing ovation over recent ruling.
- Openly threatened Iran. Stupid…
- Military brass sit during “repeal ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’” standing ovation.
I tried to keep track of the number of standing ovations. I can’t find an official count online yet, so I’ll be the first to present how many I counted. I think there were more, but I am confident there were no less than 46. I did count partial ovations, but only when one side of the aisle stood as one. There were many times when only the Democrats stood (a “Demovation,” not to be confused with the Republican only “Dumbovation”).