Thursday, May 19, 2011


This isn’t a major announcement or anything. No big whoop, but I have formed my own religion. I don’t anticipate any rush to join, but I ask that all refrain from asking for membership until I have everything all worked out. My religion is sort of in beta.

I post this because I have the name. I thought about it a while, what it is I worship. I don’t really “worship” anything. But there is something I turn to when times are tough, when it seems like nothing matters, or when I’m just sad: humor. Not so much the humor though, but the laugh.

Like my detractors, I don’t consider myself a comedian. If I say anything funny, it’s largely for my own amusement. I don’t tell jokes for the benefit of others, I do it because it makes me happier to pepper an otherwise depressing or preachy post with a pun or joke.

In fact, this reminded me of something from when I was growing up with religion. I remember a joke was never as funny as it was at church. You could tell the worst joke, but if it’s coming from the pulpit you found it funny. Not because you were humoring the priest, but because of the juxtaposition of something as serious as religion and something that was often set up to be a serious sounding anecdote that ends with a punchline you never expected in a house of worship.

There were no dick or fart jokes, or worse. And yeah, maybe there was some function of me being 6-12 years old… but still, I stand by the observation. There is just something appealing to me about the idea of a funny religion, or perhaps a religion that emphasizes the funny things in life.

Like any person who was previously religious, I know little vestiges of my religious upbringing and education creep into my life and actions now. Personally, I attribute much of my reactionary anger and short fuse to religion. Having mingled with many other Catholics and non-Catholics, I notice a sharp distinction. I act like most Catholic men I know.

It’s weird, really, because I don’t know whether to attribute it to Catholicism or the culture of Catholics. This phenomenon is also very pronounced in Judaism. I swear, I can talk with you for about 30 seconds and I can tell if you are Jewish, or at least grew up in Brooklyn. This isn’t a bad thing, there are just certain mannerisms that catch on among different communities.

I would love nothing more than to cultivate (if for no one but myself) a new culture of humor before violent rage. Please remember, I can’t even report on the success of this religion yet, so please don’t think of joining in lieu of seeking professional anger management counseling.

I’m bored and I don’t believe in segues, so here’s a joke, a bonus Wednesday Word:

snart: a sneeze that causes one to pass gas
My religion is not above a flatulence joke.


  1. Humor can be your friend. The only thing is, I'm frequently the only one in on my jokes.

    maybe their not really funny? Or maybe nobody else has quite the developed sense of humor I have? I like that the latter.

    Just hope you don't get the snits !

  2. I'm of the opinion that the best jokes are really for the benefit of the teller. I think Andy Kaufman was onto something...

    A snit, or a sheeze? What about all, three, a shnart. These would be great troll names...

  3. This idea is laughable.

  4. This idea is laughable.

    Laughable... or chucklesome?


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